Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor except in his hometown and among his own relatives and in his own household.”

                                                                                                                        Mark 6:4 

It’s a topic that’s not easy for some to think or talk about, but it is all too real for many Christians; being in a family that is spiritually divided. The Bible makes in clear that despite mankind’s seemingly endless labels and divisions, from God’s point of view, there are only two types of people; those who are a part of the kingdom of God (the saved) and those who are not. Consider the following:

For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. He who believes in Him is not judged; he who does not believe has been judged already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. 

                                                                                                               John 3:17-18 

Jesus came to save sinners. Those who admit their need and call on God to save them become redeemed, regenerated people (believers). Those who reject faith in Jesus for either another philosophical system or nothing at all remain unregenerate and are spiritually dead (unbelievers). Jesus explains that the division between the two has nothing to do with one’s economic, political, racial, or ethnic background. This division is a spiritual one and it carries consequences on earth and into eternity.

Jesus was no stranger to this phenomenon. When He traveled back to His birthplace, Nazareth, He began teaching in the synagogue and many people were amazed. But those who knew Him from His childhood were contemplating His ministry. The verdict that many arrived at is expressed in a very brief but powerful statement, “They took offense at Him.” Why would the people that, arguably, knew Jesus the best, take offense at Him? Jesus responds with a powerful truth in which many Christians living in spiritually divided homes can relate. “A prophet is not without honor except in his hometown and among his own relatives and in his own household.” Why is it that believers can so often have a profound effect on the lives of strangers while seemingly remain powerless to influence the very people they care about the most? In order to answer that, let’s consider the following passage: 

And He could do no miracle there except that He laid His hands on a few sick people and healed them. And He wondered at their unbelief.

                                                                                                                       Mark 6:5-6 

Unbelief not only causes division between believers and unbelievers, it also quenches the possibility of the miraculous from happening. Scripture tells us that Jesus could do no miracle there (with a few exceptions). The passage doesn’t leave us wondering why. We are told that Jesus “wondered at their unbelief.”

For those of us who reside in a spiritually divided home, this same sense of wonder may surface. How is it that the people we love and care about the most could be so callous when it comes to spiritual things? Let’s consider three possibilities.

First, the family unit could be a product of two people who were unequally yoked. Perhaps one spouse was a believer while the other was not. When children are brought into this situation, it can be quite confusing. Whether or not the parents are divorced or together, the children are spectators to two different lifestyles. The only way that this can be remedied is for the child to be born again and enter into a personal relationship with Jesus. This is often a scary proposition due to the fact that the child (even if they are in adulthood) does not want to alienate the unsaved parent. This is one reason why the Bible warns against being unequally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14).

Secondly, there may be a lack of forgiveness in the family unit. Unresolved hurt between family members can lead to a refusal to forgive and consequently that can manifest itself through anger and bitterness. This harboring of unresolved issues within a family can act to stifle any spiritual life that would otherwise be ready to blossom. Again, scripture warns us about the consequences of refusing to forgive (Matthew 6:14-15). It blocks God’s ability to forgive us as well. A lack of total and complete forgiveness for one another and failure to address issues can result in the rejection of the gospel by some and lead to spiritual division within a family.

Finally, sometimes this spiritual division is simply caused by two individuals walking two different roads. We all have a decision to make regarding salvation. We can accept the gospel or reject it. Jesus put it this way:

This is the judgment, that the Light has come into the world, and men loved the darkness rather than the Light, for their deeds were evil.

                                                                                                                           John 3:19 

Some people will not come into the Light because they prefer to live life on their own terms and consequently that leads to spiritual death. But just as life and death have nothing in common, so believers and unbelievers have nothing spiritually in common. Jesus put it this way: 

Do you suppose that I came to grant peace on earth? I tell you, no, but rather division; for from now on five members in one household will be divided, three against two and two against three. They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law.”

                                                                                                               Luke 12:51-53

It is hard to negotiate spiritual rejection from those you care the most about but there is hope in any family that is willing to kneel together before the Lord and ask for healing and restoration. When the reality of being in a spiritually divided family gets you down, just remember that Jesus was no stranger to being rejected in His hometown.

One last thing: as Christians we are to persevere in our efforts to pray for others and make ourselves available to those who are willing to listen. A spiritually divided family is a mission field and it is quite rewarding to participate in speaking truth into their lives even if they are resistant to your efforts. Never give up and live your life so that some day you will hear Christ Himself say, “Well done good and faithful servant!”